Exhibit

If 2021 was a secret agent... It would have been Cary Grant in Charade.

Christmas Eve…

It is Friday night and three seconds just have passed since I took the first sip of a disgusting alcohol free beer… Why in gods name did I choose this period to go alcohol free for a while… My god, it is horrible! A good beer is priceless, and it is actually one of the things that genuinely makes me happy. Fresh developer, fresh film, and a fresh New England IPA.

Well, of course there are plenty of other things. But that would just make a really long list and creates less of an entertaining story.

Whenever a setback happens I just take my time to feel like shit for a brief moment. And as soon as that has passed and I have dusted myself off, I double down on reinventing myself. One of the perks you get I guess from having a shitty childhood. So as soon as the Netherlands was thrown into another lockdown in the blink of an eye, it was a good moment to dust myself off and make sure I would turn it into something positive.

So that means becoming better at my craft which is photography, and a workout every day. Despite I am already fit, that stupid rona is not going to get me. But the reality is: It is either abs or IPA’s. You can’t have both. And ever since I stopped competing in Olympic Weightlifting those IPA’s tasted a little bit too well…

Channeling…

Slowly taking another sip, and when I put my glass down it seemed like the perfect moment to reminisce about 2021. And one of my other goals is to channel my emotions better into art without any distractions. Reminiscing is a good catalyst to do that. And hopefully the more time progresses I will become better at it. The main goal of art is not imitating your heroes, but unapologetic personal expression.

An LP of Marie Laforêt is playing in the background and I hope I can finish the sentence before I have to turn the record to the other side. I succeeded…

Since I have had an outlet I always summed up my year and what happened to me. That too seems like a fruitful exercise. To reflect… To see what can be done better. Or what I did well… Did I follow my heart and was I true to myself?

So far so good…

2021, my most successful year so far… And also a super sad one…

The biggest mark 2021 has left on me is not the success I have had this year as a photographer. It was the loss of my little nephew whos life was lost during a car accident in October. Cremating the little fella just two days before my birthday was the most surreal thing ever. It is a scar that will be hard to heal. And for my sister, his dad, his bonus dad, and my niece every day feels like drowning while the rest of the world is breathing.

It also made me indefinitely pause the project about my dad for a while. They say projects are never finished, but just abandoned. And that is completely true… I just couldn’t anymore. Not now.

The project did bring me a lot though. It made me better… It made me learn. And even better… It gave me eleven freaking exhibits which three of them were festivals… And one of the locations was in a castle! And also a book! Which is crazy! If you would have told me that at the end of 2020 I would have never believed it.

Bluebird, if you are reading this… I could not have done this without you.

Yes I am talking to you. There is only one person in the world that I call bluebird.

You have no idea how special you are to me. I will keep saying that till the end of time and until you feel it, not just hear it.

And when I start slacking, I hear your voice with your unique accent in the back of my head like you said in one of your voice messages saying: “But you are not a lazy photographer…“ And that is the moment I continue my grind.

Plus, no one in my entire life has ever told me they are proud of me. But you did…

It is a beautiful realization how important it is to have the have the support of people you care about. In the past I always did things just by myself. Didn’t have people I could spar or reflect with. Or just vent… And most of the time I was just not understood. When I was still a weightlifter I had my coach. He maybe didn’t always understand me, but he always made a effort and did his best. And that goes for the two people who are prominently right now always supporting me without them even maybe knowing how big their impact is. Bluebird, and mister “rare dingen“.

Goals are never easy. Especially if you have big ones… I know I have to work my ass off. So yes, sometimes it feels like grinding. Taking photographs is not easy. And no one will ever come knocking on your door and say: “Hey do you want to be in my gallery?“ I approach things the same as I did with my sport. Just work and work. And eventually you get there. Just never give up. Even if you know you still have a long way to go and a lot of growing to do.

I did start two new projects though. One of them will be made as a visual poem. And the other one will be about masculinity done in a way that is not that typical. I want to break through social boundaries with that. More on that in 2022.

So if 2021 was a secret agent… It would have been Cary Grant in Charade.

Charade has become one of my favourite movies. And whenever I felt down I started watching it. Behind those muscles and that beard lies a hopeless romantic which still believes in fairy tales and magic and literally daydreams all day.

Cary Grant plays a character named Peter Joshua. Not the main character though! That is the lovely Audrey Hepburn… He is working on a case about stolen money and experienced a copious amount of setbacks. In example he got sliced by a man with a hook on his hand, shot at, did weird dance moves with a piece of fruit and the bosom of a big lady…

Even when the woman he fell in love with dropped ice cream on his suit he still managed to make everything right.

2021 felt a bit like that… It has had ice cream on it’s suit, but it still made it right. Freaking lockdowns or not I still went to Egypt. Had exhibits. Made new friends. And had fun!

Didn’t count how much rolls of film I shot this year, but it was a lot. Also made plenty of prints, so that made me happy as well.

So what will 2022 bring…

I have totally no idea… And neither do all of you… I can name some of my goals though. And one of those is to get gallery representation with a gallery that is a good match. With an emphasis on a good match.

Improve myself as a human being and a photographer.

Paris Photo.

Being a better printer.

I want to go to Iran to see my friends and travel to Kurdistan as well. And see what other place I can go too.

Write more poetry.

And attend one of those freaking opening drinks! Can I just for once go to one of my own opening drinks!!!??? It is not about the drinks itself. But every success how little or big should be celebrated. And I am tired of celebrating on my own. It is just not the same… And it is lonely…

When time progresses the list of course will change up a bit. And despite it is a short list here, no worries. My list is in reality waaaay longer.

As long as it is magical it is all good…

Another thing that I want to explore is the idea what happens to a person’s identity when the scars or pain is gone… Eventually you have to be on your own again because life will come and get you. So what happens to your identity? Who are you when you can’t rely on it anymore and use it as a crutch? Who is your true self?

It is a subject matter that made me curious.

And upside down end…

These closing words were written in the evening of December 30th… Marie Laforêt has turned into Glenn Gould playing his version of The Well-Tempered Clavier. Book 1: Prelude No. 22 in B-Flat Minor… It indeed takes that long to write something. To me it is important that every word is well thought out. I want them to have weight and meaning…

Slowly getting sleepy because from at one point in my life being a night owl, I have become an early riser. I will see and fall in love with the earth before the sun does…

Hopefully the moon will not be upset… No worries moon, it is a different kind of love… Not a lovers love. Another reason is also to make sure these words will be ready to read for you on the 31st…

So that leaves me to this.

I want to say thanks to anyone that either follows me and my adventures. Supports me in either my personal life or outside. And everyone that has ever crossed my path. It may have crossed for just a short time, or maybe even for a long while. But I have become a better man by meeting you. One way, or the other…

So happy New Year to you all…

Make it magical… And chase those dreams whatever they are…

I know I will…

~ Cristian

Some random photographs that were taken through the year…

Dante 2021

Hey everyone,

One of my photographs was also part of the Dante Exhibit of Dante 2021 created nu dotART and together with the Municipality of San Daniele del Friuli. And was exhibited on the Trieste Photo Days.

Of course super happy about that. But there was also a book involved. And that book finally came in the mail!

The book is on the occasion of the 700th year anniversary of the death of Dante Alighieri.

If you are interested in the book yourself you can buy it here.

Opening Reception Mono - Kromatik Praxis Arts Center.

Besides father’s day last weekend was also the opening of the group exhibition Mono - Kromatik at the Praxis Gallery and Photo Arts Center in Minneapolis Minnesota, US which I am part of with my photograph: “There was a moment when you asked me…”.

The exhibition is from June 19th until July 3rd 2021 in Minneapolis, Minnesota. In the United States.

So if you are from that area have a look around. :)

Monochrome exhibit at the Blank Wall Gallery.

Hi all!

Happy to announce that my photograph What-Is-Love is participating in the monochrome exhibition with the Greek home for contemporary photography, Blank Wall gallery based in Athens. It can be seen till June 2021.

Covid is still doing stupid stuff in Europe so unfortunately the exhibit had to slide into the virtual world the still make it possible.

But still very proud of it and happy to share it with you all.

You can find the virtual exhibit here and is hosted on Kunst Matrix.

The exhibition catalogue can be found here.

And the main page of the gallery here.

Have some other cool exciting news next month, so stay tuned for that.

Hope you all are doing well, and stay safe!

~ Cristian

Introducing Andante - Portrait series of the soul. No 1.

Monday night... 23:03... 2018...

I should be sleeping but I put up a record of one of mine favorite classical pieces.

Symphonie Espagnole, Op. 21 IV. Andante...

I never knew I like classical music until I picked up a box of LP records from my uncle's place, which I inherited from my dad. Thanks dad...

Years later everything falls into place. Classical music... Photography... And a Russian photographer named Alexey Titarenko.

When I discovered his work I was blown away. I was exactly how I look at the world! He describes his work in one of his interviews as a cello playing... Long... And slow... The state of despair of cold war Russia put in an image only he could make. A real "City of Shadows..."

Later it was the name of one of his books. The other one is "The city is a novel..."

Inspired by him, and my own views of the world, I created a concept in my mind. And for two years it was brewing... Forming... Shaping... And waiting for the right moment.

An visual representation of my own cello in my monkey mind. Only my monkey plays more of a violin. But still slow!

Slow... Seeing people like a sea of souls in a world full of contradictions... Sadness and joy... Beauty and pain... Truth and lies... The ultimate form in shapes of what people really want but actually do...

It is like writing my own novel...

Only with the camera.

Or is it more an autobiography?

I truly believe that something magical happens when you press the shutter button. The visual representation you see might be a composition. But for me it feels like opening up my own soul, bare naked, to express how I see this giant magic ball floating in space we live on but can't put it into words...

Luckily I shoot work full of joy too. But both sides are a part of life. The sad needs to be there to enjoy the beautiful even more. Balance... And my close friends know that I always say...

As above, so below...

Art is a good way to vent. And something can be beautiful, and sad, and full of joy at the same time. A dramatic depiction of life! And do we need more drama? Maybe... It creates a lot. From connections, to romance, and even substance and depth. Maybe it is even a message of the things we tend to forget. And maybe not even forgotten but put aside because of the rat race we are stuck in... No matter which mask you are wearing or character playing...

I guess I am sidetracking now... Back on topic!

I should be a story teller...

None of my street, travel, or documentary work is staged. Everything is real. And I take my pride in that. That means also this portrait series. The only thing I added to the composition is the model... Which I was looking for a long time...

Finally the right moment came when I was contacted by Roos Tulen. She is the resident artist of the city of Leiden. She decided to start her own project. And that project became herself. She signed up for a fitness competition where you had to stand in a bikini on a big stage. And that meant a completely different lifestyle than then weightlifting she was used to.

That also meant a lot of physical changes. And because of that she asked twenty photographers to capture her journey... And every photographer would capture her in his or her unique way. In the end it will become an art project by itself presented in the city of Leiden.

All the details of that I will tell in a later story. So stay tuned!

This is where I played my part. Finally I could make the concept what I had in mind for a long time reality.

Within time this concept will become a series. When I find the right soul that needs to be captured. Some of them will be made here in the Netherlands. Others during one of my travels...

Let's see...

Andante - Portrait series of the soul. No 1.